Ok. Let’s say you are with me on the NUMERO UNO point I am trying to make (see Unicorn Poop Haiku), and you are out there, revealing yourself to people who deserve your revelations, celebrating your particular dumpster fire, roasting marshmallows in the fires of those you feel drawn to. Maybe this is all resulting in bonding, maybe it is even garnering the attention of a good person or two.
Maybe one of these people is available, loving, kind. Sparkly in your loins (at least from time to time). A precious lottery ticket pulled from the slot machines of Hinge, Bumble, and blind dates.
Hallelujah, amen.
But then:
Do you feel suddenly disgusted? Do you feel sporadically repulsed? Does closeness with them sometimes feel nice and sometimes generate a hive of bees in your center? Is their voice suddenly shrill to you, their gait incorrect?
It is possible that this person, perfect expression of the refracted light of the Divine Intelligence that they are, is not a good fit.
It is important to stay awake to that possibility. You are looking for someone who is close enough to your early attachments to light up your limbic system, but far enough away to prevent you from reliving the same tired-ass lessons you have already learned.
It is also possible that this kind and available person is actually a wonderful fit. But the fact that they are available and kind is triggering ye old engulfment wound.
